Hello, world.
Did you know that the average person spends 18,476 hours of their life waiting? No, that's just a lie I made up because I wanted your attention.
I'm Megan. This blog has been created for the sole purpose of surviving my rants, my raves, my ungainly attempts at profound insight, and my heartbroken pleas for mercy. As you might have guessed from the title, it is a blog about waiting. See, I am waiting for marriage, the day when I will be able to look to my best friend and love of my life, and be able to call him my husband.
Let's meet the fabulous cast of my life. First, there's me. I am 18, female, 5'6"ish, ever so slightly padded, and very in love. I am a social work major, attempting to rescue the world one child at a time. You will hear more about this later, I'm sure.
Very relevant to this blog is my JJ. He is 20 years old, also 5'6"ish, very pale, and well-built, although it comes as a surprise to many. Yes, I weigh the same as my boyfriend. Sue me.
My family is... interesting, to say the least. I have three brothers, a sister, and two parents. Here's the lowdown. Kenny is 25 and living with my parents and I with his wife Amanda and their two kids. He's on house arrest and a registered sex offender for a stupid reason. Karen is my only sister at 24, she is a drug addict, married to Rusty, and has two kids. Joey is 21, engaged again to the 30-something Autumn this time, who has a kid. They are expecting. Daniel is 20 and living the college life without actually attending college. He is a regisered sex offender for a good reason. My mom and dad are married, but I am the only one that can claim both of them. My mom had the oldest three with 2 different dads, and my dad had Daniel in his first marriage, and then they got married and had me. One big happy(ish) family.
I think that's enough about them. JJ and I have been dating since January 2009. Ish. So about two years. We both come from conservative upbringings, so we've both vowed no sex before marriage, no dating just for fun, etc. JJ even made a promise to himself and God that he would not kiss a woman until he knew that he was going to marry her. We both liked each other for a while before we started going out, but no one made a move. Finally, in January 09, he asked me to my senior prom... and thus started "us."
We have kissed, we have spouted vows of never-ending love, and we are both completely committed to each other. So here I am, waiting for marriage. Why must I wait? Why, I'm glad you asked!
I want to get married... like ASAP. Why? I love him. I want to wake up next to JJ, eat breakfast together, run errands together, pay bills and go grocery shopping, fight over stupid things that don't matter and then laugh at how stupid we are, make love just because we can't resist each other, and fall asleep in our bed together, in each other's arms because we are both cuddle bugs.
JJ also wants this, just... well, he isn't ready. Which I understand, finally, after several depressing and frusterating conversations. As conservative as we have been raised to be, we both believe in traditional, biblical roles in the home. He will be the leader, and I will follow. He will love me and provide for me, and I will respect and honor him. He feels that he is not in the place with God that he needs to be in to be a spiritual leader. On top of this, he isn't sure what he wants to do with his life. This summer he is going to Egypt for a year to teach English. He will learn more about himself and learn how to rely on God, with His grace. I understand all of this and respect it, even though I'm not happy about having to wait even longer.
[Just so you guys know, this is what it is. I am not going to listen to anyone saying I'm too young to get married, or that he's messing with me, or yadda yadda yadda. Please don't waste your time or mine by judging a situation you don't know.]
So here's the background. Questions? Ask away. Comments? Shoot! Advice? Yes please! This is the basis for my blog and my journey on learning how to wait patiently. My hope is that other people will come alongside me and share their own stories of waiting, and maybe we can help each other to grow as people and to learn to be content with the present.
Love to All,
Megan
